I'd like to get across that it is not an easy life, allowing yourself to be gay, but that it is better than suppressing it - for it only to pop up decades later with destructing ramifications to your wife (or husband) and children let alone oneself.
I'd like to offer something to the parents, to stand up in front of them and say look I'm gay. I'm not a hairdresser; I don't prance around giving straight guys makeovers (at least not on tv). Break the stereotypes and say I'm a product of your child's school system and I made it out okay.
I'd also want to hit upon the fact that suicide amongst teens is highest in gays. I was never suicidal (up until this past year...kidding!) but I'd hate for anyone to be in an environment where they don't feel accepted.
Being gay isn't an easy life - discrimination aside - for gay men in particular. You put two guys together and the chemistry is ripe for fooling around. Men are pigs; they love sex. 99.9% of the gay men couples I know fool around on each other. That's a lot! Maybe I'm just in the wrong circle of acquaintances but something tells me otherwise. Okay, I'll throw in 10% for those squeaky cleans that I hear about but have never met...say it's 90%. Still a lot. I'd have to do a study.
Most covert openly (each knowing), others are more discreet and some have arrangements (no kissing, no anal etc. with others). Whereas in a straight relationship, the women tend to put the brakes on this but if it were up to the guy...that'd be a different story. So it's not easy. It's not healthy emotionally or physically but it can be fun and if both parties agree than what's the harm? Well...
The crux in the argument against homosexuality is that the right think being gay is a weakness and shouldn't be acted upon. Maybe we (us gays) would be better off suppressing and fighting against it and just force ourselves to be with the opposite sex. I'm sorry, I love women and can even find them attractive, to a point, but I just couldn't do that. It wouldn't be fair to me or to the woman.
Alright....maybe, maybe, maybe in a drunken stupor with a lesbian or something but even that would just be some casual experiment that we'd both laugh about the next day. I don't think I'm going to "turn" straight over it. I don't think that's possible.
My God what else is there to expose about myself? Why am I saying all this? How did I traverse down this path?
I can just imagine some of my friends and colleagues reading this and thinking Rick has truly gone off the deep end; now he's going to sleep with a lesbian!
Kidding aside, this Blog has been a bit of a savior for me through this troubling time. It's funny how revealing your deepest (and some not so deep), darkest (and light) secrets to strangers and now 95,000 (ok slight exaggeration) friends, co-workers and family members is therapeutic. It's also funny how those readers I bump into give me that all knowing look or say something like: "I didn't know you liked Torch that much." "You believe what that scum Bill O'Reilly thinks?" "Were you the one of the radio with the