Sunday, May 27, 2007

Absolut Fab: Adventures with Phyllis

Ya'll know Phyllis is in town this weekend. Of course, we had to go out again last night. God, I'm going to turn into an alcoholic, if I'm not one already.

At first we sauntered up to New Hampshire to meet up with our friend Ed. It's such a chore going up there; we hardly ever go. After futzing over which iPod play list to listen to, we finally settled on the 80's and barreled northward singing to the tunes of The Fixx and Romeo Void.

"I might like you better if we slept together. There's something in your eyes that says maybe..."

Upon arrival we were greeted by Ed and his dogs and were immediately whisked out to dinner - Phyllis's alcohol intake was low. After feasting on wine, beer and margaritas -- oh and I think there was some food involved -- Phyllis was worn out. "Don't ya'll know about central air? I'm sweating out all the alcohol...what a waste. "

"Rick, you need to truck my tired ass back to civilization. What's so new about Hampshire anyway? Nothing but a waste station for white trash residue."

So we headed back for the long drive to Boston. We were only over the Massachusetts border but being up there always seems so far. And of course, I can never remember the right way to go or get back. There's so many ways to get there and Route 495 always seems to screw me up.

"Ya but Phyllis love...we want to go south. Why do we need to get on 495 North?"

"Listen bitch. Boston that's way. I'm hot and sweaty so let's get our asses in the Volvo, put on the air and head on over to that pathetic little club of yours and get me another drink."

After once again bickering with the iPod we got on the right track. Phyllis recapped the evening. "With all my academic credentials and I'm frequenting Billy's Steakhouse in Plaistow, New Hampshire?"

Finally, we arrived at The Club in style...

And grooved to the dance music that canvassed the din of the bar. One drink, two drinks, three drinks more...

Bored with 90s music, Phyllis went on to discover she had a thing for the bartender and figured she'd get him to take his shirt off. I drifted off into a heavy conversation with a friend who attempted to offer me council on my sorrows.

The night went on. I bounced around from friend to friend but in the end there's will always be Phyllis and me.


Donnie said...

Sounds like a lovely time. I just adore AbFab. Many years ago, when they first hit the telly, a friend of mine went to London for the summer. He was kind enough to bring me back a cute little AbFab stationery set in a little paper purse. I still cherish it! :D

Anonymous said...

Now sounds like you had a good time. Got a email message regarding Phyllis arriving! Sorry I missed it. I can imagine that traveling to New Hampshire is " a chore" but I love it and appreciate it when you come and visit.

And I think I will ignore the "white trash residue" comment.